Journal Entry

Thursday, November 5, 2009

I've been thinking a lot about thinking. I go through my day: I laugh, I listen, I smile, I see, I feel. All the while, my brain is buzzing away, sending message after message to my body, thinking thought after thought. I notice the sunset glowing gold and my eyes soak it in, and I think of how grateful I am to live in this wondrous world. A moth flits by my face as when I walk under a lamppost at night, and I absentmindedly brush it away. I walk to the parking lot and pick up a piece of paper to throw away at the next available garbage can, and once disposed of I forget about it completely. I think about Anthropology and the Sapir-Whorf theory, and how I want to learn more languages to broaden my perception of reality. I think about Tom, life, and what I'm doing here on Earth. I think a million thoughts everyday, and yet...I don't think. Things blur through my mind so fast that there's no way I could record every thought, every half a thought, every little tangent and side note my brain thinks up.

I think: "You wrote an 'f' instead of an 'l.' Fix that. Keep writing or you'll forget what you were going to say. Don't pay attention to the person walking by with the jangling keys, the class going on in the room around the corner, the couple walking by that obviously like each other but aren't holding hands. Remember to practice your songs for at least 15 minutes today! Sheesh. The choir members must really be getting sick of me texting that to them all the time."

It's amazing that when you just stop and notice, you realize how much your body SEES, HEARS, FEELS, SMELLS, TASTES, UNDERSTANDS, COMPREHENDS, PROCESSES, SENSES, and KNOWS.

"Your glasses are slipping down your nose. Adjust them. Your throat's feeling parched. Take a sip of water. Someone texted you a little while ago, you should reply. Do you think you should go on a mission? Remember you have Munch and Mingle on Sunday. Heather's white bean chili recipe you tried out worked well, that would be something good to make for the ward. Fix your glasses again. You really need to get them adjusted at Costco. Hold your breath! The girl that's passing by is coughing. You don't want to get sick. Why are you remarking about all these pointless things and writing them down anyway?"

WHEW!

I've found that it's hard for me to think clearly unless I write my thoughts down. Then I feel like my thoughts are concrete--not up in the air with the other 999,999 thoughts I think of in a day. It's on paper. I can go back and reflect on what I thought and see if my perspectives has changed or if it has stayed the same.

So live. Think. Write. Go about your day. But don't just go through the motions. Really live. Really think. Really write. Treasure each moment. Each experience. Each opportunity to learn. Make time to live. Make time to think. Make time to write. Make time to go about your day so you aren't rushing, hurrying, and missing everything and everyone that comes your way. I need to work on these things. Badly.

Go live. Go think. Go write. And go about your day. But don't let things pass you by. Care about everyone you meet, care about everything you do, and take care of everything you have. Don't let your life pass you by.

"The man without a purpose is like a ship without a rudder--a waif, a nothing, a no man. Have a purpose in life, and, having it, throw such strength of mind and muscle into your work as God has given you."
-Thomas Carlyle

. . . . . . .

Life is good.

Love,
Me

Today I am grateful for: The chance I have to go to school and learn about life.